Chapter 27, Verse 2: When Will We Get There?

I promised that I'd tell more Space Travelers, and I mean to do just that. Today, you learn about my quarter-life crisis.
I can't remember who gave the quote, and I'm going to have to paraphrase anyways, but: "You're unhappy? They have a group for that. It's called EVERYONE"

EDIT: I found the original quote and remembered where I read it. It's Drew Carey and I read it on Amy's blog. "You say you're pissed off that life didn't turn out the way you wanted it to? There's a group for that. It's called 'Everybody.' They meet at the bar."

Well, I'm not really unhappy, but sadly dispelled.

Oh, and if you thought that this post was going to be more cool England shit, sorry. The connection is that I came to my conclusions on my quarter life crisis during my trip, so that's why it falls here. For your enjoyment, I did include pics of the lovely Ruth, and ever adventurous duo Taylor and Chi.
You must understand. It has not been easy for me to fit in. Imagine that. In my earlier years, it was being shy, but having a very active imagination. As I grew up and my communication skills developed, I began going through a very awkward stage of saying incomplete things. Some speech pathologists say that people who stutter simply fail to be able to speak at the speed they think. Well, I might have had a similar thing, only I just said parts of things. It sounded weird, but it's not really material to the story, so I'm going to just keep going... The point here is that by time I had learned how to properly communicate, I was at the age where our social hierarchy had began to harden. This made me a "fringe kid."

Being on the fringe meant meeting other all-star weirdos who were pretty cool. Everyone was truly unique and all struggled to fit in their own way. We became close. You know lunchroom politics? Well, we beat them... by not even eating in the lunchroom. One of those fringe kids was Taylor.

As the years went by, the molds that held these various social roles were loosened. In college, some people break out, and join the fringe. Other molds stand strong letting their contents harden more.

After college, more molds release and then fail to hold their shape. Yet more people on the fringe and what they long for is to be back in the mold where they think they made sense.

So here's my crisis; here is my dilemma. I just thought someday I'd fit in somewhere. I thought I'd arrive somewhere and when I got there, people would be magically awaiting me, smiling and they'd say:

"We've been waiting for you to get here."

I guess I've been holding out for some retribution; some good prize for staying who I am. I want my character to fit. Why must being free be lonely? Why can't we earn acceptance?

But I already knew the answer. I knew it the second I realized what my crisis was. The answer was and will always be those fringe kids. I have been accepted many times in my life. My journey has brought me to some of the most amazing and unique people. I've never found a place to take me in, but I can build on the little real estate we're given. Like the lunch room politics, we just ate in the hall, completely bypassing it. Now as an adult, I know the community I want, is one I have to build. It will not build itself. What I want in my life, is not waiting at some point in the future for me, but that is not to say I can't have it if I try.

If I want amazing friends, I don't wait for them to find me. When I want adventure and when I want to feel alive, I don't wait for an invitation.

I guess all the molds eventually crumble and everythign is reduced to the fringe. It's like the 2nd law of social dynamics. Some people just live there longer than the others.

I don't know when I'll be satisfied, I don't dare think what would be left if I knew.

Chapter 27, Verse 1: Where Are We Going?

Wotcha Space Travelers! London's Calling, and I've paid a refuckingdiculous amount of money to have a mobile phone abroad. Note to self: Get prepaid next time.

I've spent the 4th of July the last two years in different curcumstances: Thee flight deck of a WWII aircraft carrier in San Diego, and last year in a massive city evacuation drill on the National Mall here in DC (Golly it's true. Arnest!).

This year, I satisfied my urge to just leave. No, not in a Sean Penn I'm-moving-to-Canada kind of leaving, but rather for the reasons of...

Okay, so I didn't have a reason, but I could. Okay? I did it because I could. This year I spent the 4th of July in England. Ironic as it may sound, it turned out to be one of the best ideas I've had in ages. Add to that, the presence of one Mr. Taylor Park, and it's an adventure.

Taylor added two important ingredients to the trip:

1) Poland - Neither of us speaks Polish, but Marta was going to be there and we knew we could make her our language slave for a few days.

2) Couch Surfing - An adventure in itself, we didn't stay in any hotels. Our hosts were indie posh students at Goldsmiths, a 60's Mod who used to get in fist fights with rockers (achievement unlocked), and Bollywood Art Directors. Our trip was meant to be memorable.

I had not left the USA since 2004, and that was only for a day trip across the border into Mexico (inside scoop: The ring I wear on my left hand was bought on that trip). Before that, I had gone on a study trip to Japan. That trip interestingly enough was also with Taylor.

I remember the day I bought the tickets. I remember because it was the day my passport expired. It had been almost exactly a decade since I first left the country. Like that first trip abroad, I hoped this trip too would be full of firsts and overwhelm my senses.

It's good to get out, see your world in the third person. It's good to be the outsider; not get all the jokes; struggle with the local vernacular. A unexpected thing I learned, is that push come to shove, we could out drink the British. I'm worried about what this says for our college system.

They say "Life is a journey." I say "Life is a journey, if you chose it." There is no passive adventure, only active quests. I can't hold out that someone else is going to just come a long and make my life what I want it to be, but more on that some other time.

Photos From Englishland

Good evening Space Travelers, wherever you are. The robot is still broken, so I haven't been able to prep the blog with words about the trip to England. I'm here, and I'm with Space Traveler Taylor Park. Without too much delay, here's the breakdown.

Our trip is a couch surfing trip. During this part of our trip we have stayed with people from a forum I've been posting on for the last 3 years.

We spent a while in Airport-town, and then got on the London Underground which was very stubborn about staying sub-terrianian. From the left to right: Ruth, Taylor, and then myself.
Chatting on the wobbly bridge over the the River Thames after going to the Tate Modern.
Taylor Park and this Large Benjamin fellow. Note: Big Ben is not the clock, it is the large bell inside.
We brought sunshine. How kind of us. Bazza thanked us for getting him out in the sun. Bazza told us stories about the 60s and being a Mod in London. This guy used to sport a jacket and get in fist fights with rockers.
Ruth on a spendid evening in Greenwich after a (very) proper english meal at the Spread Eagle.

More pictures are on their way Space Travelers. Live and love big time. Back to adventure.

vLog: Home on the Range

Hola Space Travelers! I am sorting through all of my unedited footage from the tail end of last year so that I might be able to offer something fun to you all. I found some really great video of fellow Hero Taylor Park and myself on a weird adventure in our hometown of Springfield, MO.

Submitted to be fitted, watch and enjoy but don't play coy. Light's, camera, action, no matter what's your faction. Please turn off your cell phones, and turn on your imagination.

We're going home, home on the range...


Peace out Space Travelers, and know that more is on the way.
~Chi